Sexuality is a complex subject. It encompasses an infinite number of practices and fantasies. Spanking is just one of many. The most important thing here is that the spanking is mutually consensual.
As with any sexual practice and game, you and your girl both need to know that this is exactly what you want. Tell each other about your preferences and ask her if she is willing to share this new experience with you. Be sure to also discuss how hard you want the slap or spank on the bottom to be.
To make sure that everything is within previously agreed boundaries, the safeword is very important in the BDSM world. This should be any term agreed upon beforehand that clearly signals a stop: This is as far as I’ll go and no further. It’s important that the safe word is a distinctive term that is unmistakably heard and respected in the heat of the moment.
The right atmosphere
The setting in which you conduct your spanking has a direct influence on the mood and intensity. Provide pleasant lighting, such as candles, a red light bulb, or a dimmable lamp, to create the most intimate atmosphere possible, where every sigh, moan or gasp can be clearly heard. Put together a suitable playlist of songs that have few lyrics but provide a good rhythm to your movements and create a quiet background noise to ensure the necessary discretion.
Also pay attention to the room temperature. In a slightly warmer room, your muscles will relax better, and your skin will be more receptive to all kinds of touch. During a short break, you can experiment with a cool breeze to create a tingling sensation. Have a few supplies ready, such as a clean towel, a gel containing arnica or aloe vera, and a glass of water for the person receiving the massage. This thorough preparation builds trust and ensures a smooth process.
Transform an ordinary room into an erotic setting, using all of your senses – sight, hearing, touch, smell – to make every slap and every blow, every pause and every touch unforgettable.
Best position for spanking?
There are various positions that are well-suited for spanking. The following positions are particularly popular:
- Kneeling: The passive part, who receives the slap from the active part, kneels on the floor and bends slightly forward.
- Standing: The passive partner can also receive a slap on the buttocks while standing. Their hands can be placed on their hips or braced against a wall.
- Bent over: In the bent over position, a bed or sofa can be used as an aid.
- On all fours: In this position the passive part is in a stable four-legged position.
Always remember that the position you choose should be comfortable. For support, you can place a pillow under your knees, for example, to prevent pain from occurring when kneeling or on all fours.
If the chosen position proves uncomfortable or painful, change positions. The goal is to find the best and most comfortable position for giving and receiving pleasure.
Practice makes perfect
Before spanking your partner for the first time for the pleasure of pain, you should experiment with how much force and intensity you want to use. This will help avoid unintentional injuries. Start very gently, for example, with your hand or a towel. Observe your partner’s reactions and ask if the chosen technique is okay. Don’t forget what you both agreed on beforehand.
A slap or blow can be more or less painful depending on its intensity. Ask which parts of the body are particularly sensitive and which you should avoid. Repeat the slap or blow to get a feel for the intensity before increasing the force. As always, trusting and respectful interaction, as well as mutual agreements, are important.
Start with a gentle slap
For the perfect introduction to this new sexual practice, start very gently with a light slap on the bottom. Then gradually increase the force and frequency. Again, observe the reactions and feedback so you can adjust. If you notice the pain is too intense, stop immediately.
If you sense that your partner enjoys pain, you can vary your technique. This will prevent it from becoming monotonous and too strenuous for you. Pay attention to how these changes are received by your partner.
Best toys for spanking?
If things go well, you can introduce toys and accessories for your new style of play. This ensures variety and diversity. Of course, this also needs to be discussed beforehand. If you’re a spanking beginner, it’s worth testing out the chosen accessories beforehand to avoid accidentally hurting your partner.
These accessories can make the spanking more varied:
- A paddle. A Paddle is a flat instrument for corporal punishment made of wood or leather. A paddle delivers a flat, firm blow to the bottom, which feels more intense than a gentle slap with the hand.
- A whip. The whip is usually made of leather, it allows you to strike from a distance. The strike is somewhat lighter than with a paddle.
- A strap whip : A Strap whip is basically a handle with leather straps. With a strap whip, you can tickle, caress, and punish.
No matter which accessory you choose, you should always use it carefully and discuss its use beforehand. Be sure to pay attention to any physical and verbal reactions to the use of the accessory.
After spanking?
After the spanking session, you should discuss how you perceived the experience. This is the only way to ensure that you both found the spanking pleasurable. Perhaps you have suggestions for improvement for next time.
For a nice ending, it’s always a good idea to pamper the passive partner. Massage their bottom and enjoy the closeness. Afterward, you’ll both be ready for the next time!
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