If you’re unsure whether you want to be a BDSM Dom or a Sub, why not try being a Switch? You can find out exactly what a Switch is and how exciting the role can be here.
BDSM stands for the three word pairs: ” Bondage&Discipline, Domination&Submission, Sadism &Masochism”, and because of its central position, the overarching meaning of the letter pair “DS” becomes abundantly clear. Anyone who has ever attended a BDSM meet-up knows how important this is, because newcomers are regularly greeted with the question, “Are you a Dom or a sub?”.
We humans simply love categories, so naturally we’re tempted to immediately pigeonhole someone into one of these two categories. After all, these are the two categories for BDSM practitioners – or are they? Not quite, because there’s a third way to be active in BDSM: as a switcher. “To switch ” means to change or switch roles, and that’s exactly how switching in BDSM should be understood. A switcher is someone who can feel comfortable in both the top and bottom roles.
What is a BDSM switch?
A switch is someone who alternates between domination and submission. This dynamic shift depends on the mood, circumstances, and atmosphere between the partners. Switching isn’t always sexual; it’s about exchanging power or reversing the existing power dynamic. Switchers also frequently report that whether they feel dominant or submissive depends on their partners. There are also dominant women who only occasionally explore their submissive side with other dominant women.
How do you know if you’re a Switch?
It’s quite simple: Think about what turns you on. Then try out what fascinates you most in your fantasies. If you sometimes want to take control in the bedroom and at other times are excited by the idea of being dominated by your partner, then there’s a good chance you’re a switch.
If you’re unsure, talking to your partner(s) can help. Absolute honesty is important.
What’s so great about switching?
Switching partners offers the possibility of playing in different ways with very different partners. This provides the chance for a deeper connection with one partner or interesting and varied relationships with multiple or changing partners.
What’s unique about switching is the opportunity to see the “other side of power”. You become a better submissive if you’ve also tried being a dominant. Besides, many experienced dominants and dominatrixes started out as submissives anyway.
You refine your skills, and switching roles can also be very liberating mentally. You can explore different mental landscapes and free yourself from roles you believe you have to play during sex.
The downside?
Aside from the fact that many switchers say it’s easy to become addicted, there’s no real risk. As a switch, you understand the risks from all sides and quickly get the methods to minimize them. Every BDSM scene carries risks, which is why consent, concepts like SSC (Safe, Sane, Consensual), and the use of safewords are integral.
How do you become a switch?
Definitely talk to your partner first before you officially begin switching roles. Don’t expect to be the perfect queen or the “King of the Doms” from the very first second. Get into the role, start small and humble, and slowly ease into the new dynamic.
Take this unfamiliar aspect of your life extra slowly. Start with gentle, simple restraints , light punishments with easy-to-use implements. You’ll quickly discover what you’re comfortable with and naturally try to expand the possibilities for yourself and your partner.
Important for switchers!
There isn’t one single “switching” style that applies to everyone. There are no rules, there is no manual that dictates how to switch or what you have to commit to switching. Everyone is different in their inclinations, needs, and predispositions. One dominatrix might always be strict and commanding, but every few months she might submit to the right guy.
Switchers, especially those with one dominant side, sometimes have the problem that they aren’t taken seriously and are expected to finally commit. Ignore that and just be yourself!
Are you a Dom and want to test being a sub? Pick a domination escort, give us a call and we’ll fix you up with a perfect date. And if you just want to test out some masochistic tendencies, we have some very hot fetish escorts for you to choose from.